Reflexive Voice.

I am doing a six week tutorial on Essay Writing. Had a struggle with the Reflexive Voice – but it came out OK. Here is a glimpse – ready to become a personal essay.

SACRED STALKER – REFLECTIVE VOICE

I went over in my mind this dangerous day on the sea. My reflections were savage, yielding ugly truths I had long buried. I thought of the line of whiskies on the bar, a celebration of returning from the furious sea in one piece. The truth was that there was nothing to celebrate. A rebuke was needed for my recklessness in endangering the lives of others, including my first born son. I thought of the furious sea as a piercing dirty grey, the color of dying – waiting for me. I saw clearly that I was not in the right place internally and did not belong here. I had obscured this true confession to myself with blind recklessness. The shrouds fell away and for an instant I could see just what I had allowed myself to become. I was no heroic captain at the wheel, just stupid, reckless and displaced. I had to put an end to my madness on the sea. This was not my domain in life. This beautiful island in the Hebrides was not where I was to be. The stressful drain on time and energy to travel back and forth between Canada and the Isle of Barra was debilitating. It left me with zero life-force energy for the work I was destined to touch. I was merely surviving ‘midst the suffering of being totally misplaced. So down I went into the graceless oblivion that alcohol and depression permits.

 

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